Policy Paper Family Jungschar

1. Familie als Teil der Schöpfungsordnung

2. Glückliche Familien bilden das beste Fundament jeder Gesellschaftsordnung

3. Familien – Tempel Gottes

4. Familie als Schutzraum gegen die zerstörerischen, menschenfeindlichen Zerfallserscheinungen

5. Familien helfen Familien – soziale Netzwerke

6. Ganze Familien gewinnen für das Reich Gottes

7. Familien erleben Freu(n)de – Fantasie – Frieden

8. ... ehe es zu spät ist!

"If current trends continue, fewer than half of all children born today will spend their childhoods permanently with their own mothers and fathers ... and an increasing number of children will witness the breakup of their families two or even three times in the course of their childhood." (B.D. Whitehead)

1. Family as part of the order of creation

Family is not an invention of human beings. Family is a creation order of God just like the earth's gravitational pull. Those who disobey these natural laws will fall. The family is a part of the wonderful, creative work of God. With much love, God has devised the family as a small paradise in which man and woman can form and experience intimate relationships in an incredible variety. Family is a thought of God and an ingenious one at that. The Bible understands the family as a permanent structure of a man and a woman who produce and raise children. Lifelong faithfulness and dedication characterizes it.

2. Happy families form the best foundation of any social order

"The best protection, of course, is to take precautions against such family tragedies in our own lives and the lives of our children. And that precaution consists in teaching God's truth about marriage and family to ourselves and to our youth. If our young people have firm moral convictions about marriage and family, those convictions can guide them in their decisions and lead to better marriages and healthier families." (J. Macdowell / B.Hostetler, Faith Without Values, p. 199)

I dream of families with fathers who plant God's love in the hearts of their children, who hold up their hands not to smite but to bless, who use their mouths to praise and not to shout, who don't schedule their time but give it away, and who open their innermost being so that their children can read God's greatness in it. I dream of families with mothers who do not see their position as a tiresome duty but as stewards of most precious gifts, who do not throw their children out of the nest but shelter them under their wings, who do not put the TV down as a child's aunt but lovingly tell stories, who welcome their children with words of comfort and release them again with shouts of encouragement, of mothers who still believe in their children when everyone has long since given up on them. I dream of children who recognize how valuable parents are, who honor and listen to their parents, of children who look up and pass on the love they have received, of children who do without and demand less, who tackle and wish less, who confidently shape their lives instead of letting them determine them, of children who still enjoy being children. I dream of families who don't forget to dream and laugh.

I am not looking for the perfect family - but the family that is on the way, enjoying the grace of God and His goodness. Your dream of family may be very different - you are different. But I desire that we reflect on how wonderfully God has made and devised all things. That we hold fast to His promises when even the roof over our heads is falling down. That we don't longingly dream of vacationing by the sea, but see the sky shining even in a puddle of rain.

"The place where the baton of truth is passed is family!" (Edith Schaeffer) ... and the truth is: God loves family and wants to give them gifts.

3rd Families - Temple of God

"And when she and her house were baptized, she exhorted us, saying, If ye esteem me a believer in the Lord, come into my house, and abide all there. And she constrained us." (Acts 16:15)

I continue to dream - of houses that are not made of stone but of renewed people, that are not secured with armored locks but whose doors are wide open to others, whose contents are not made of perishable treasures but tell of God's great deeds. I dream of homes that do not tremble from stereos, but resonate with songs of praise. Of homes whose only light is not a flicker, but a warm-hearted glow.

It is so gratifying that in some countries the house church is being rediscovered and contributing enormously to the growth of the kingdom of God. What would happen if we, as families, newly uphold God and His Word in our midst? If we as fathers took up our priestly responsibility and were an image of the heavenly Father? How would it be if not only instruction, but childlike questioning drove us forward? What if we developed a new awareness of God's thoughts about the family as His dwelling place? What if God's presence filled our daily lives, if we prayed driven by His Spirit and not out of habit to command the children to sleep? What would it be like if we became sensitive to the struggles in the unseen world when children are troubled in their sleep, when sudden inexplicable pains come upon them, and restlessness drives us? What would it be like if we then acted in the authority of Jesus and didn't get discouraged in worry or even blaming each other?

The family in the Old Testament: everyday life and the relationship with God - everything a family did - was based on God's law. Children were encouraged to ask. Memorials were erected. Parents taught and reminded their children of God's wonderful leading. Feasts were in honor of the Lord. They communicated joy and hope. And today?

Before we think about family-oriented youth ministry (or church ministry), we must seek a new understanding of God's creation order "family." We need to think intensively together about how and why and for what purpose God created the family. Then we must discover anew God as Father (Mother), live in His security and faithfully pass on this father image to our children - not so much with words, but with renewed life. We need to ask God anew how He envisions church and family.

4. family as shelter

The bird builds its nest, the fox its den and man his hell! Or how to explain the heinous war crimes, the countless car accidents, the abuse in one's own family, the ...; I will not go on. The family can only be a shelter where God's supernatural intervention changes the heart of each member of the family and especially of the parents. In this way, the child as well as the husband or wife can find refuge from the coldness of the world. A family in the presence of God resists the spirit of the times. It is not driven by temptations. It has direction, knows forgiveness and unconditional acceptance. It lives appreciation, gives comfort, spurs on, goes towards a high goal and binds to the one who has overcome the world. It resembles a gas station, a refreshment bath, a lighthouse, a fortress, and perhaps a circus!

5. Families help families - social networks

I can rightly be accused that the above statements are pure wishful thinking and only cause additional frustration. To this I would like to counter

• Whoever does not set goals, lets himself drift and changes nothing anyway - but with that we accept all consequential effects. Thus we continue to work mainly with the "fire-fighting method", i.e. we put many times more into fighting the symptoms. Wiser would be a cause cleanup.
• Alone we can do very little, because the environmental influences are strong. A common rethinking and especially mutual, energetic help is necessary (see practical explanations). It has been proven that people with a good social network live happier and healthier lives, as well as cope with difficult things far better.
• There and then, we must be willing to make sacrifices and let go of many a thing we have come to hold dear. We need to rethink our values; in particular, our relationship to materialism, perfectionism, self-actualization, media, and mobility. Edith Schaeffer's book "Lebensraum Familie" is for me one of the most encouraging books I have read about family. Far more than instruction, it gives insight into the diversity and beauty of life, which is to be appreciated with all its ups and downs. It gives enormous courage to persevere, because suffering brings patience, patience brings experience, and experience brings hope. She encourages rethinking and discovering how wonderful family can be. She encourages us to become creative. She tells of the delightful moments that come in reveling in beautiful memories.

6. Whole Families Winning for the Kingdom of God

Interestingly, the desire for an intact family has been on the rise again in Western countries in recent years. Family offerings are becoming in. The church of Jesus must face this demand anew. For too long it has given room to the zeitgeist of individualism. For too long it has unilaterally promoted age groups, and here and there it has unintentionally weakened the family. Too much parental responsibility has been delegated to the church.

As noted in point 3, I believe that God especially wants to glorify Himself in the family. I firmly count on His blessing as we begin to be more family oriented. Even if only one part of the family (child, wife, husband) chooses Jesus, our church or community should be attractive enough that they are glad to be there. The Holy Spirit must reveal to us anew how this can look in detail. We lack wisdom and examples. I bring up some seemingly absurd ideas in the practical section with a challenge not to pick them apart, but to sow them.

A family-centered Jungschar seems to me to play a crucial role here - it is the natural bridge from family to church. I firmly believe that a congregation would gain enormously if it lived more as an "extended family" within itself. By this I mean to suggest that I am not just concerned with the welfare of individual families - I am aware that families are only one part. Central is the "family thinking" in the church. All members belong to this family!

• Where are the opportunities of the family being exploited?
• Where does the church program take into consideration the family?
• Where does the community practically support the family?
• Where does the congregation weaken or even burden family life? Where does it separate family members?
• What is the place of prayer for sanctified families?
• How do we bear the aftermath of the anti-family environment (single-parent families, divorces, ...)?
• Where and how are there tensions between families or between families and individuals?
• Why do we not baptize children until they are teenagers or invite them to communion until after the so-called classes?
• Where are family issues addressed in the family circle?

7. Families Experience Joy - Imagination - Peace

In this section I try to give a wealth of ideas for families respectively for a family-oriented youth/parish work. Some of it even requires collaboration beyond the local church.

7.1 Learning to rethink - addressing family

• Bible work on the theme of family and church as family
• Share and process videos and books in the form of seminars, poster board, idea basket, competitions, picture galleries, photo exhibitions, journaling, ABC collection, ...
• Concrete intercession
• Invite guest speakers
• Formulate goals and create implementation plan

7.2 Parish as family network

Over-age outreach and opening up, reaching out to the neighbor (see Good Samaritan) are crucial:

• Young people offer themselves for childcare
• Experienced, older persons share from their rich life experience and pass on practical wisdom or lend a practical hand in household chores, child rearing, ...
• Mutual cleaning help (cleaning parties), childcare so a couple can have a marriage weekend or a marriage seminar voucher
• Material help, social fund, joint shopping (e.g. directly from the farmer), borrowing a car or other things, transportation, ...
• Sharing leisure time, holidays, family celebrations, ...
• Family house circles, families help with worship, make plays, music, give testimonies, do children's programs together, ...
• Families open their doors to the lonely, single parents and invite participation in their family life through their hospitality
• Community rooms as living spaces e.g. sitting area, changing table, toilet pot, highchairs, framed pictures, playground equipment that promotes movement, clothes box, ... - I see tremendous opportunities in the redesign of community spaces in particular. We should consider whether our understanding of congregational (spaces) is not Old Testament or even traditionally churchy in some ways, turning worship spaces into sacred halls. The New Testament no longer speaks of this - it speaks of the temple and thinks of us who are God's children. Our children in particular unconsciously find this restrictive, dismissive. Our children already have to be "good" in school, in most anti-family homes .... "be good" - and in church, of course, much more, otherwise they disturb and shame their pious parents.
• Lent day, soup day, workshop classes, joint evangelistic outreach, more sharing (question-answer quiz games)
• Bible reading in the family
• Married couple's afternoon parallel to Jungschar
• Mother's holiday

7. 3 Family-oriented, missionary youth/parish work

• Organization of children's festivals (birthday parties), making the parish rooms available for family events, ...
• Winter children's playground in the parish rooms, crèches in large shopping centres or in the parish during special shopping times,
• Designing seminars (parenting, marriage, partnership)
• Family outings, low cost adventure/adventure family vacations where the family experiences "everything" together and is not divided back into age groups!
• Father-child or mother-child experiences
• Creative week, craft classes, hobby week, cooking classes ... and workshop, children's participatory circus for the whole family
• Puppet theatre and other theatre forms
• "Television series family live!"
• Sports week, family gymnastics, new games, ...
• Library, ev. video library, cassette library, library, ...
• Pure nature experiences, hikes, be on the road and discover, ...
• Mothers' camps
• Family Jungschar - more about this see program examples Uznach

8. ... before it's too late!

Not new consumerist programs, but rethinking are needed. A vision for a new family: missional, intergenerational, promise-, relationship-, experience-, victory-, giving-, person-oriented, encouraging, practical, vivid, gripping! Just do it!